David's Sin

My title this evening is 'David's Sin', and we're looking at 2 Samuel 11. Please have that open in front of you. You can find it on page 262 in the Bibles. And there's no escaping the fact that the sin of King David here is serious sexual sin. Then that leads him in to further serious sin. He commits adultery with Bathsheba. He then kills her husband by abusing his power to make sure he dies in battle. Over the last couple of Sunday evenings we've been able to learn from David's kindness, and his victories. This evening he is a reverse role model, as he plummets from the heights to the depths. For all his strengths, he is not the Messiah we need. He is a man like us.

It's an uncomfortable subject, then, that we're covering this evening. So let me immediately begin with the good news about sexual sin. You can find that good news in 1 Corinthians 10.13, where the apostle Paul says this:

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

Note a number of things. If sexual sin is a problem for you, you're not alone. If you're a believer, then you, with the help of the Holy Spirit, are always stronger than the temptation to sexual sin. And you will never find yourself in a situation where there is no way out and you have no choice but to give in. God always provides a way out.

Now maybe you immediately think, 'Yes, but what about when I fail to take that way out and fall into sexual sin? What then?' Well there's even more good news. 1 John 1.9:

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

That's God's promise. So although this is potentially an uncomfortable and even painful topic, there is hope. There is hope of avoiding sin. And there is hope of forgiveness if we do sin. It's important that we're clear about that before we go any further. If we know there's hope, we're more likely to heed the warnings about this that God gives us in the Bible.

So, as we look at this passage, I have a sequence of simple questions for us to consider.

There is of course a great deal more that could be said about this than we'll cover in this overview, so if this leaves you with important unanswered questions, then I'd encourage you to talk to someone you trust so that you can get your questions answered. So, to my questions.

First, WHAT IS SERIOUS SEXUAL SIN?

Serious sexual sin is sex outside marriage, and it needs to be said that marriage is between a man and woman for life. Sexual sin, of course, also has a much wider reference. It is sexual desire wrongly directed – sinful desire. Sexual desire can be thoroughly Godly and directed in the right course. Then it's good. God puts into our hearts and minds Godly desires. But when those desires are distorted and misdirected they become deadly.

The lust that Jesus talks about, as we heard from Matthew 5, is sinful craving, it's being greedy with your eyes, and it's intensely focussed on having and on doing – possession of what is not ours, and physical acts that are contrary to God's will. That kind of sinful craving is in contrast to love for our heavenly Father and with the desire to do his will. And there is no place for it in the life of the church, the Body of Christ – or in the life of the individual believer. Ephesians 5.3:

But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints.

Secondly, WHEN ARE WE VULNERABLE?

This is where we come to King David and Bathsheba. Take a look at 2 Samuel 11.1-2 (there on page 262):

In the spring of the year, the time when kings go out to battle, David sent Joab, and his servants with him, and all Israel. And they ravaged the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained at Jerusalem.It happened, late one afternoon, when David arose from his couch and was walking on the roof of the king's house, that he saw...

And we'll come back to what – or rather who – David saw in a minute. It seems to me King David is very vulnerable to sexual tempatation here. Why?

Arguably, because it's spring – so do be careful as the days lengthen and temperatures rise! But I don't wish to make too much of that.

Also he's a man – and you've only got to have some slight awareness of the male psyche, not to mention the horrifying statistics on the use of pornography, to know that men are prone to lust. But then it's not just men. Potiphar's wife is an example of a lustful woman. Genesis 39.12:

... she caught [Joseph] by his garment, saying, "Lie with me." But he left his garment in her hand and fled and got out of the house.

Maybe in women these sinful cravings often take a different form to those of men – do the sales to women of some Mills and Boon romantic novels somehow reflect the sales of pornographic material to men? I hesitate to answer that question, but just leave it hanging in the air. And then there's the 'Fifty Shades of Grey' phenemenon. Either way, men are vulnerable – but so are women.

Then King David is young – at least relatively young. And sexual craving is generally stronger in the young than the old. On the other hand I heard a radio discussion about the so-called male menopause during which so many aging men discard their wives and go lusting after younger alternatives. No age is invulnerable.

It's late in the day and David's tired but not asleep. Perhaps his moral guard is down as a result. We need to be self-aware about the times when we find ourselves more easily allowing ourselves to drift towards sin. But then sin can strike at any time of day.

Perhaps most significantly of all, David is neglecting his responsibilities and is therefore at a loose end and maybe even bored. There's a pointed reference in the account here to the fact that this is the time of year "when kings go out to battle … But David remained at Jerusalem." If he'd been preoccupied, as he should have been, with his leadership responsibilities, then he wouldn't have found himself in this vulnerable situation and frame of mind.

Be aware, and be on guard against times of vulnerability.

Thirdly, WHAT ARE THE STEPS TO SERIOUS SEXUAL SIN?

Back to 2 Samuel 11, from verse 2:

It happened, late one afternoon, when David arose from his couch and was walking on the roof of the king's house, that he saw from the roof a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful.

The first step is temptation. But be clear that to be tempted is not a sin. The indications are that David was not expecting to see this woman. He just saw her. And that is not a sin. We need to be realistic about this. We live in a culture in which we're constantly surrounded by sexual imagery. And of course we don't segregate the sexes. Nor should we.

It's perhaps worth making a tentative comment that it might have been a good idea for Bathsheba to have pulled the shower curtain across. She wasn't responsible for David's sin. But it is the case that women can graciously help men to avoid lust by dressing modestly. In 1 Timothy 2.9 the apostle Paul says that he wants women to dress "with modesty". That is a help to the men.

But there's something else important here before we move on to the next step. Verse 2 says "the woman was very beautiful…" Why was she beautiful? Because God made her beautiful. Physical beauty and sexual desire are God's invention.

Burning coal in the fireplace warms the whole room. But throw that same coal into someone's lap and it's deadly. Water running between river banks is life-giving. But when the river bursts its banks it can destroy family homes.

Women are beautiful, and thank God for that. In fact when we thank God for it, we're on the right track. It's when what we're thinking requires us to shut God out that we're in trouble. The ideal is not a humanity with its sexual desires surgically removed; nor is it burqa type clothing that hides us away from one another. The ideal is a healthy and Godly mutual appreciation. Men and women would then not be sex-objects to be lusted after, but brothers and sisters to be loved in the family of God.

So temptation is not sin. But the easiest way to deal with temptation is to give in to it, and that is what David does. Verses 2-3:

... he saw from the roof a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful. And David sent and enquired about the woman.

The second step is to start playing with fire. Why does David want to know more about this woman? This is no longer innocent – although he could still be rationalising to himself that it is, and that he's just curious. But it rapidly gets worse. The account continues:

And David sent and enquired about the woman. And one said, "Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?" So David sent messengers …

The third step is to cross the line from temptation to mental sexual sin. He had no business sending for her. He has allowed his lust to take hold of his mind and his mental sexual sin is beginning to drive his behaviour. This is a very slippery slope, like an icy, compacted sledging run. Even at this stage he could be telling himself that he's just going to have a cup of tea with her and chat about how her husband's doing on the battle field. But in no time David escalates things. Verse 4:

So David sent messengers and took her, and she came to him, and he lay with her.

So the fourth step is to move from mental sin to physical sexual sin. Now irretrievably other people are directly involved in the sin. In fact the adulterer David has sucked Bathsheba into committing adultery herself against her husband.

And we don't have time to look at this closely, but as the account unfolds through this chapter it's clear that there's more. The fifth step is that the physical sexual sin leads on into wider and wider forms of sin. So David abuses his God-given power to murder Bathsheba's husband by proxy. Sin leads to more sin. And deeper and deeper we go, until we're drowning in a sordid sea of lethal lies and deceit.

Those are the slippery steps to serious sexual sin. James 1.14-16 puts the process in a nutshell. God does not tempt anyone …

But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers.

What's the next question?

Fourthly, HOW CAN WE AVOID SEXUAL SIN?

This is something we very easily overcomplicate. If we say to ourselves that it's complicated and difficult, that helps us to excuse ourselves when we don't do it. But really it is simple. How can we avoid sexual sin? Flee from it. And flee from it immediately. Flee fast. Don't toy with it. Don't humour it. Don't even try and resist it or get in a fight with it like two heavyweights slugging it out. Just flee from it. Get out of there. Now. The longer you leave it, the harder it gets because the weaker is your resolve. Flee now. 2 Timothy 2.22:

So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.

1 Corinthians 6.18-20:

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honour God with your body.

Flee from sexual immorality. Joseph is our role model in this, back in Genesis 39.12:

[Potiphar's wife] caught [Joseph] by his garment, saying, "Lie with me." But he left his garment in her hand and fled and got out of the house.

And one things that helps us to flee fast is if we've already made up our minds long before that that's what we'll do when we find ourselves faced with temptation. Then we don't have to hang around while we debate with ourselves about what to do. How can we avoid serious sexual sin? Decide now to flee fast, and when the temptation arises, run.

Fifthly, WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES OF SEXUAL SIN?

One answer to that is look around at our society. Our lust-laden, adulterous generation is inflicting untold grief and suffering, and leading millions into sinful patterns of living that are searing their consciences, hardening their hearts against the love of Christ, and deadening their capacity for faithfulness. Sting sings these striking lyrics:

All made up and nowhere to goWelcome to this one man show …In this theatre that I call my soulI always play the starring role, so lonelySo lonely, so lonely…

That's like the song of a lost generation. When the star is me and everyone else is the object of my lust, it's so lonely. God has a better plan.

I saw the latest episode of the Morse prequel Endeavour on TV the other day. It's set at the time when the sexual revolution is beginning to bite. The young Morse's mentor Fred Thursday, a veteran detective inspector, who's just seen the signs of an abusive sexual relationship between a man and a vulnerable young woman, bursts out:

Free love! In my experience that's the most expensive kind there is.

But in the end the consequences of sexual sin are even worse than the terrible harvest of suffering and loneliness that our generation is reaping. Jesus is so frighteningly clear. Here are those sobering words of Jesus that we heard earlier from Matthew 5.27-29:

You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.

The ultimate consequence of unbridled and unrepented sexual sin is hell.

But as I said at the outset, there is hope. So:

Sixthly, WHAT SHOULD WE DO IF WE FALL INTO SERIOUS SEXUAL SIN?

We should admit it to ourselves and to God; confess it to him; put our trust in the sin-bearing and substitutionary death of Jesus on the cross for us; receive forgiveness by faith; and face the continuing consequences of what we've done. We cannot undo what we've done. David had got Bethsheba pregnant and killed her husband. He had to face the consequences. More on that next week. We cannot undo what we have done. But we can be forgiven. Our guilt can be wiped away once and for all. We can be free from condemnation. That is what our gracious, merciful and loving God has done for us in Jesus. That is what he applies to our hearts by his Holy Spirit.

If you're struggling to grasp the reality of that forgiveness, think about finding someone you trust, someone who understands the grace of God and the reality of forgiveness, someone who can keep a confidence, and confess your sin to them. It's a wonderful thing when another person knows the worst about you and still loves you. That experience helps us to realise how God deals with us.

He is a holy God who cannot tolerate sin. And he is a merciful God who pays the price for our sin himself. So let the prayer of the repentant King David in Psalm 51 be our prayer as we close. Let's bow our heads to pray:

Have mercy on me, O God,according to your steadfast love;according to your abundant mercyblot out my transgressions.Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,and cleanse me from my sin!For I know my transgressions,and my sin is ever before me.Against you, you only, have I sinnedand done what is evil in your sight,so that you may be justified in your wordsand blameless in your judgment...... Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.